Saturday, January 02, 2010
- 11:20 PM
I know what I need to do now.
Well, not really, but in a way.
I know how badly I need (or is it want?) to use someone.
To get into a frivolous relationship, have its ups and downs like a roller coaster, cry and obsess just like I used to.
But now things are different.
I realize how wrong it is.
Wrong to lead a girl on, tell her I like her or at least make her think that when I honestly don't
Wrong to let myself get cheat on again,
and perhaps even more wrong to
not care when it happens
I want to pretend I'm feeling something that I'm not so sure I can anymore.
And once again my bothersome convictions come up to me and tell me that its not an honourable thing to do.
At this point, I think I've got no choice but to listen to them.
You hear me? Blasted things.
Don't worry, I won't do anything rash.